What do I do? Do I stay or do I go?

My husband says he wants a divorce and although the break down of the marriage is both of our faults I have always stayed hopeful that one day he'd make that gesture, want to be with me but that isn't to be. He says he is set on a divorce but he still hasn't filed for some reason, I don't know if he's playing games or maybe... I wish it meant he really didn't want this... He is military and because of a recent problem I am thinking about moving back home to my family. I am 27 weeks pregnant, supposed to be on bedrest and we have 3 other kids (well one of which is mine from a previous relationship). I don't want to go, in fact I wish I could stay, I wish I knew that we'd work it out... My heart is absolutely breaking leaving him and every chance that our marriage would work but I can't change his mind, I can't make him want me and frankly, I'm done trying. I've spent our whole marriage begging him and now I can't do it anymore. He's everything to me and our kids but without that show of faith on his part, what is the point in staying and feeling worse every single day? I have had help from some Mom's in my Mom's group but that wont last forever and he's made it more than clear he has no desire to be there for me when I am in and out of the hospital. The stress level is through the roof... Every day he wanted to talk about divorce and I couldn't take it, I said things that I am not proud of, that I wish I could take back... I wish things didn't have to end like this. Our kids cry every single night for him and I don't know what to do anymore... My Mom is here to help me until we leave and when she came down here I thought she would be able to stay with me for a while so I could weigh my options, figure out what I wanted and needed to do. But she told me, upon her arrival that she only has 10 days worth of her medicine and she absolutely has to be back to Michigan before she runs out, which I understand. Now I'm under a time constraint knowing that I have to get her back and I don't want to end up here, alone again if I just pay for her plane ticket... I also had taken some money that was in our savings so that I could try to get home but the transfer I had set up from his account, because I have no access to it, was obviously canceled and that basically means I'll be getting to from here to Michigan on the bare minimum, hopefully will make it and once I do I'll have nothing left to last me and the kids the rest of the month... I keep thinking that maybe if I wait around long enough he'll make that gesture to me... let me know he cares but he hasn't and honestly, I think I am living in some fantasy land if I think he will... He never has. I've always begged him to stay with me, bugged him really and it has just made me bitter. It makes every time he took back the divorce a lie, like I had wore him down, not that he really loved me or wanted to be with me... And that made things so much more difficult to let go of those issues... I can't even talk to him because of a no contact order... We had an issue and it ended up that I was given a personal protection order which the military then extended from the weekend through the next week and that apparently included a no contact order. But when I talked to his 1st Shirt he made jokes about him being my ex, or my soon-to-be-ex (all said while laughing as though that's even funny?)... He also said that my husband didn't really care to respond to the email I had sent to him... I don't know what I'm holding out for, I don't know why I am so sick when I think of leaving but it feels so damn wrong. However, at this point I am under a huge time problem with my Mom... I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm sick of family members and their "well meaning" advice that just makes things that much harder... So I thought I would ask this question to complete strangers... If you were married, and you loved your husband so much it literally hurt and your whole life, your marriage was on the line would you stay? Or would you go? Leaving means we get divorced, no matter what... Staying... well that probably does too but I hate the thought of leaving. My kids need their Dad... I need my husband. What do I do?!